How to Build Social-Emotional Skills at Home

School classrooms are busy places where young children

learn many things, including social and emotional skills

such as how to express feelings appropriately and how

to work together with their peers.

Here are some suggestions for helping your child

develop better social and emotional skills at home.

Puppets. Teachers use puppets to talk with children about conflicts. This helps

them to think about solutions in a cold executive function way. Puppets are a

great way to introduce children to feeling words like happy, sad, angry, and

children often identify with puppets because they are smaller and childlike.

They will often talk to puppets about their feelings. Puppets can also help in

discussions about challenging topics, like eating our vegetables or how to

move safely.

Think out loud. Thinking out loud helps children. You have your own way of

processing new information and so do children. Keep in mind your processing

should be age appropriate and not include things like yelling, cursing or

hitting things.

When your child hear you verbally process new information, it helps your child

to understand how to cope with frustration and solve problems: "Whoops. My

shoe lost its heel, it might be time to find another pair from my closet today and

maybe look for a new pair this weekend."

Read bedtime stories. There is something magical about this end-of-the-day

routine that makes it the ideal time for talking about feelings. While reading,

discuss the characters and events in the story. Invite your child to share her

thoughts and feelings by asking questions: "What do you think he should do?

How do you think she feels? What would you do if you were them?"

Do a job together. Instead of asking your child to do a chore alone, do it with

her. The two of you might fold laundry, set the table, rake leaves, or paint a wall.

Help your child join in by shortening the handle of a broom to make it child-size

or providing a small paintbrush or roller. Remember they won't do the job as

well as you, so praising how well they did is important.

Play games. Board games and outdoor games such as tag or relay races offer

built-in opportunities to help children learn to take turns, cooperate, handle

frustration, and more. While playing games together, focus on fun instead of

winning or losing.

Prevent potential problems. Before a friend comes to play, help your child put

away toys he/she does not want to share. Before taking a bus to the zoo,

provide a step-by-step explanation of what you will do: "We will wait at the bus

stop for 5 minutes, then get on the bus and sit together and watch the sights

go by for about 30 minutes [explain this as the length of one episode of a

favorite TV show]. Then we will walk three blocks to the zoo and tour the lion

house before anything else!" During the trip, remind your preschooler of what

will happen next